Friendship on line dating
“Iknow him from the internet.” When I say these words to explain how I made a certain friend, they’re often accompanied by an involuntary pang of embarrassment and can still, in 2018, provoke a raised eyebrow.I suspect these reactions aren’t just leftover from the days when internet relationships were considered nerdy or perverted; there seems to be an enduring belief among some that a friendship is only valid or “real” if it was established in the physical world.From what I’ve observed over the years in myself and in others, there is a real sense of joy in finding your people online, in discovering a community and realizing you’re not a weirdo, especially if your interests are a little on the niche side, or you’re marginalized and struggle to relate to the people who are geographically closest to you.When I was younger, growing up gay in a small town, the internet was how I found other LGBTQ people — and that has carried on into adulthood. It’s where I can go and know that people will share my love of certain things and my anger at others; it’s where I can communicate entirely in shorthand without having to pause the conversation to explain to a bystander what certain words mean.
In the digital world, as in the physical one, quality trumps quantity, and if you’re fortunate, you may find a select few truly valuable connections amid all the likes and retweets. I’m currently planning a trip with my Twitter DM group chat, a wickedly conspiratorial cabal I speak with daily, more regularly than most of my real-life pals or even family.
“Social bonds reduce the risk of disease by decreasing blood pressure, cholesterol and heart rate,” report Dr. “A lack of close confidants is as harmful to your health as smoking or being overweight.
Indeed, people without friends are more likely to die younger.
I can talk about all kinds of personal and embarrassing things when it doesn’t feel as “real” as having a conversation in the flesh.
Even if online relationships never cross over into the physical world, a DM-only friendship still has genuine emotional value.